Anyone who knows me knows that I have love for old metal, especially of the thrashy variety: Venom, Cynic, old Metallica, Slayer, King Diamond (on the not-so-thrashy side), Marduk is crazy fun... and now Municipal Waste is a great thrashy band. But there are a couple reasons I don't listen/relate to a lot of metal... One being the lack of reality.When I was a kid, and listened to metal as much as punk, I began to make the distinction that punk, hXc, and hip hop were speaking a language I understood; metal, I started to understand, had a message that was convoluted @ best, nonexistent @ worst. Some metal bands have remained in my heavy rotation since, but I don't frequent metal shows, mostly so as not to catch another assault charge, as drunk idiots spilling beer on me is not my idea of a good time, nor is watching a bunch of vikings wreaking of marijuana whip their sweat-soaked hair around to appease their metal gods.
Also, if I am going to a show, I have a hard time giving my $$ to a band whose ultimate goal in life is a big fat record deal and the unavoidable corpo sell out. Say what you will, but corporate-packaged rebellion is... well, corporate-packaged rebellion. Music, like art, should be done because that is what you do... not to get paid.
Getting Paid. Yes, getting money for doing something you love is the biggest high. Money isn't bad... and as long as it doesn't consume your every waking thought, the more the merrier. Gwar is a big commercial band... but I dig what they do. The same could be said about King Diamond, who, from Them through The Eye, were selling records like evil little hot cakes. I think they were both, on different levels, poking fun at the ideation of the so-called rock god and his drooling, adoring fans [Green Jello is another good example! -Ed.].
I hate hero worship. I hate adults who live vicariously through, I don't know... let's use Pantera for example. I like some of Phil Anselmo's other bands, but to me Pantera was the ultimate corporate rebellion band. With confederate flags flying, they sold a vague non-message, at 15 dollars a pop, to suburban youth... There is no movement involved, no real message. There is a general anti-authoritarian feel to it, but more like a kid who is mad at their parents - there are no solutions given, just broad statements about "the system".
And then we have the "rock star" factor of metal.
Let me take you to the period of time when I started going to shows... late '80s/early '90s. Two shows stand out to me as illustrating the differences between hXc and metal people.
Winter of '87 or '88. My friend Joey & I go to our 1st "non-local" hXc show: Bad Brains. Hearing a legendary band, whose music has truly had an effect on so many people's lives, was only the beginning... HR and Darryl talked to a group of us younger kids about what this scene was, about PMA*, and about family. To have these guys, who were... well, I didn't even have a word for what the Bad Brains were. W/out them, core would have been very, very different. To me, The Spudmonsters were "famous". But these were just guys @ the show... no bodyguards or entourage, no rock star bullshit, no superiority illusion. They spoke to us, 12- & 13-year-old kids, as equals.
Then, in Summer or Spring of '90, a friend invited me to go see Metallica at a stadium show. I had never been to a huge show like that, and it sounded like a good idea. But where I got solid real talk at Bad Brains, that is in my creed to this day, what did I get from the Metallica show?
Well, someone called me a little faggot because I was wearing a Black Flag shirt and cut off camos (same guy, separate comments, about both the shirt & shorts... I guess only gay dudes wear shorts... idk), I don't even know how many people offered me hits off joints, or a drink of their beer (fucking gross), one guy tried to sell me acid... I was 13! I was called various things when I turned down the offered drugs and drink... But Metallica themselves are not responsible for this, I am illustrating the quality of "Metallifans"... Metallica offered me no drugs.
We did find out where they were doing an impromptu meet & greet after the show, in the bus dock... the three members I met all offered to sign my Black Flag shirt - I declined, as the idea was weird to me (I wouldn't have let Black Flag write on my Black Flag shirt!) The bass player, Jason Newstead, was like, "Oh, wow! Black Flag is rad!!" and shook my hand; both Lars and Kirk simply shuffled past me, and on to tits, after I declined to let them write on me or my clothes...
It was here that I saw that ugly side of metal... I didn't want to be the 30-year-old at a show, bullying or offering drugs to a child, if anything I wanted to be able to someday have as much knowledge as Bad Brains had, and maybe share that with the next generation someday.
As the years passed, I kept a distant relationship with metal... I like who I like... but I do not support that lifestyle. I don't usually go to a str8 metal show. Although many people are trying to close the gap, with money-hungry people from the hXc scene dumbing down the lyrics and calling themselves "metalcore", and metal bands cutting their hair, getting tatted up, dressing like cartoon versions of hXc kids and calling themselves... well, "metalcore".
Fuck that.
I remain true to that which remains true to me... I am down for the core forever, and my only hope is that I still have something to contribute...
In the end, I don't hate metal... it's the fans & greedy-ass musicians who sell their art that I dislike.
-Pabs
*PMA: "Positive Mental Attitude".
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